It's Monday Morning

How should I start? Where should I start? I don't even know how I am currently feeling. It's just that there is this big throbbing pain in my chest. It's like something is not right and I am out of my wits to solve it.

I thought things should smooth sail from the last time. It was suppose to be easier when things are said and discussed. But why do I feel it is not? It's like the weight of the world is upon me, and I am not allowed to do mistakes. Not Allowed, no room for discussion, end of story. Hey, I am not saying I am an angel, but a little bit of understanding and coaching would helped better.

Last two weeks was great, I was very very happy like I never felt before. I felt like the pricess in the fairy tales that I used to worship. I did not expect that I cud feel that happy before. Alhamdulillah, I did. Sometimes I thought, was dis a dream? And kept remind myself that it is not. I was genuinely happy and grateful to Allah for giving me the opportunity to feel like this.

Maybe, the fact that I am feeling that the happiness slipping away made me feel like this now. I am just hoping and praying hard that it is not true, it is just a blip. A small blip kamy, the happy thots and feelings will come back.. I hope coz I can't bear feeling like this. If I am the source of the blip, I wish I could turn back time and make it better. If only...